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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Posts: 11,
Visits: 25
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Hi all,
I wonder if you can help me,
I am rebuilding my relationship with my wife of 23 years. I am looking for the magic that brought us together originally, as I lost my way over the last 12 months.
can any of you provide any tips or advice on the best way to do this?
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Post #1275
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Posts: 3,
Visits: 0
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You could always start with the trite and tried bunch of flowers as a surprise .... A big turn on for women is a man who will help out with the housework (and do it properly ie.. the way she likes it.. lol). Are you financial enough to go on dates, take her to the movies and dinner, for a drive to a cafe for lunch on the beach perhaps.... ask her what her dreams are, what would she like to be doing, is there anything you can do to help make those come true.....
Hope that a helpful start for you. Don't under estimate taking time out for her (and hopefully she will do the same for you)
Good luck
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Post #1302
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Posts: 11,
Visits: 25
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thank you for the advice, my wife has made it clear that she does not want me to do that - the issue I have is honesty and trust, and even though I have been been very honest, over the last 8 months, she does not trust me. This has been the hardest thing for me to except and am looking at ways to build that trust up again, knowing that it will take time. I am just wondering how much time is required.
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Post #1329
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, February 03, 2011
Posts: 2,
Visits: 0
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Hi there, I do understand where you're coming from. You clearly want to make things right. All I can suggest is that you reassure your wife that you love her. Perhaps a promise ring as a symbol of your new dedication after troubled times? Probably too early to do the renew of vows as she will probably still be feeling the hurt. But just love her, not spoil her, and having time to talk and spend time together...it will take time.
She is probably guarded at the moment, unsure if she should let you back in her heart again or not....just be patient and perhaps seek some counselling. Sessions on your own and then together as the cousellor sees fit. But make sure you see the SAME cousellor. Start rebuilding that bridge between you both and perhaps give her little gestures of your honesty and faith. Tell her what time you will be home from work or where youre going, ask her to come along for a drive too...so she can see for herself.
Hope this helps...I wish you all the best.
L.
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Post #1556
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, June 09, 2011
Posts: 3,
Visits: 17
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One thing I learnt a long tme ago is the true meaning behind the word or understanding of the word 'Trust'. In our relationships somehow trust has become synonymous with"you do what I want and only what I want and I will 'trust' you, but if you do anything else then you have broken my 'trust'
To me I trust my partner to do anything she wishes that she believes will make her happy. She knows what she wanted or wants in this relationship, and I know what I wanted or want. Will I agree with her choices? not always but how I react is my choice, and cannot be influenced by her actions, words or deeds (mind I know that is easier said than done)
The real crux is communication. talk about how or why you lost your way, talk about how you feel, and be open about whether your remiss etc. But first of all you have to know the answers to what or why you did what you did that led to you losing your way.
If you have to live your life "proving" you can be 'trustworthy' to someone else's definition you can never relax never be you, never be self honest for fear that it will not be enough.
If you are genuine that you want to move on from the past then all you can do is be the person that your wife married -- not someone who is "trying" to be something they cannot be.
If your wife is a loving person and not a controller - she will accept your desire but most women can easily tell if your not sincere -- so it's down to you to know in your heart what you want and why you want it,and then communicate that in a direct loving and open way -- no excuses, no blaming - just the truth
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Post #1733
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 2 days ago @ 9:08 PM
Posts: 8,
Visits: 629
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Hi, I have been in a relationship for 3 years with a lady that has 2 boys 15, 19, recently my partner asks me what have you done in the past 3 years for the relationship, my response was there's the door take it which she did and now is very apologetic, the reason I showed her the door is that I have contributed both financially and emotionally for example a purchase of 2 pc's lounge suite holidays cash loans i phones ect.
We were planning to get married in march 2012 though i have issues with her and how ungrateful she is given her recent comments.
Further her 2 sons both sit on the pc 12 hrs a day don't help out and act like 5 yr olds, take entire weeks of school at time months just to sit on there arses playing pc games waiting for there mother to come home and be a slave to them.
I really loved this lady but am now doubting this union could ever work !
I am divorced and have 3 children of my own I paid out my wife over a million dollars and after 30 yrs of working have a mortgage of 500k.
Help ??
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Post #1886
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Sunday, September 25, 2011
Posts: 1,
Visits: 3
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@Joel...After reading your post feels like you must first resolve your things and than go for marriage.
business phone lines
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Post #1894
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Saturday, January 14, 2012
Posts: 2,
Visits: 6
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You must handle it with patience. You have to show your care and love to her.
http://www.bedroomeyes.info/
Edited: Saturday, January 14, 2012 by
bre123
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Post #2014
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