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Group: Forum Members
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Had the meeting with the court appointed counsellor - very interesting. Started off quite anti, she had read the wife's affidavit and quoted instances out of it. After they were explained and put into contect it all became a lot clearer. Counsellor met me, then wife, then kids, then wife n I. She said that the kids couldn't maintain eye contact while describing the 'litany of events' against their dad. the amount of sophisticated verbage coming out of the mouths of a 11 & 13 year old is untrue.
According tot he kids, dad was a 'good dad' while at home, but as soon as I left I became the devil incarnate. Tellingly, she said my 11 year old son was wasted at school - he should be working in a bank or trading floor - the level of understanding that he displayed of all our bank accounts, money spent, money earned, paid by whom, how much, when and what it bought was incredible - and totally out of keeping for a child that young.
Disappointingly, the counsellor shied away from any direct criticism of my wife's actions in this whole sorry saga. Other than recommending ongoing counselling (that I've organised) and recommending continuing visits, agai8n it's me that has to do all the running.
Meanwhile, my wife sits there in a free home waiting for me to give it all to her while she spends $2000 per month in maintenance. As boot for the deal, she expects me to pay for them to have regular trips back to the UK! Apparently, if you do squeeze hard enough, you DO get blood from a stone...
Next day in court went ok, lots of negotiation between lawyers, I got what I thought was a very good outcome on discovery and a few other things. Magistrate was openly appalled at her vexatious clawing of anything to do with money, and ridiculed her continual references to all my possessions. I'm hopeful that the mediation hearing in March will bring some sanity, if not we have the whole 3 day catastrophie on court - but I do feel that this is my best chance for a good outcome.
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 9 hours ago
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ok, so - surprisingly got settlement at the mediation conference on Friday last week. There has been massive animosity over the past few months, the kids are totally alienated from me and there is nothing I can do. I've been paying for counselling since October and my disgusting wife has twarted any effort on my behalf to have a relationship with my kids. The list of horror stories is long and twisted and I won't cover it here.
Silly woman refused any attempt by me to begin discussions on split of assets etc, kept insisting that her lawyers had promised her 70/30 and she spent $50K finding out at mediation that she was wrong. Got a 63/37 split on assets and a 50/50 split on Super, so worked out 60/40 overall. Then incredibly she said she didn't want the house (didn't want a mortgage apparently) so I've agreed to buy it. The additional savings on stamp duty, lack of real estate agents fees etc throw another $50K back into the pool, so a 45/55 split after all that, and I get to keep the house I bought and paid for over a period of 20 years (albeit with a huge mortgage).
Kids are adamant that they want to depart off to the UK with her for the rest of their lives, and thanks to the efforts of my wife I get ZERO court ordered access to them (her intention all along) she can take them whenever she's ready. The only upside to it is that if they go, they'll realise how crap it is there and maybe want to return. Sooner gone, sooner back.
Unbelievably, she asked to stay in the house after the settlement was complete - just to minimise the impact on the children. The sense of entitlement is just staggering...
One day, maybe the kids will see for themselves...
I hope...
Edited: Friday, March 11, 2011 by
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